Say What......????

Have you ever found yourself reading some magazine as you wait for something to happen, be it an oil change, teeth cleaning, blood work, etc.? Sometimes these magazines are so different from anything you’d buy that you are just kind of stuck reading them or watching the wall or other people who are usually watch you.

Oh I found some cute ones the other day – it was an All Poster magazine and man, did they have some crazy ideas and Classic Signs -- here are a few of my faves:

• Laundry Room, Push button for service, if no one answers, do it yourself!


• There will be a $5.00 Charge for Whining.


• My house was clean last week --- sorry you missed it!


• Sarcasm – just one of the many services we provide.


• I love cooking with wine ----sometimes I even put it in the food.


• Finish your beer – there’s sober kids in India

After I got through these, the next few pages were devoted to Motivational Humor Posters and again, these are wonderful, I’ll attempt to describe the photo and then, the caption beneath for your reading pleasure:

• Four pencils all in a row, 3 showing the sharpen points, one the eraser, the caption: Don’t be afraid to be different.


• Visualize, rear end of an elephant walking away with the title “Success” underneath and the caption: Find the biggest ass and Kiss it.


• Visualize man holding beer glass and under photo the word Appreciation and the caption: A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.

So the next time you find yourself waiting in some office or business, instead of taking your own book, thumb through the ones they have and see if you can’t find something interesting or at the very least entertaining! Or if you prefer, sit there and look at other people who are looking at you and trying not to get caught looking! (ya, like you haven't seen or done this yourself - get real!)

Ya it’s a slow week – spending way too much time on appointments and reading waiting room magazines!!! So I leave you with this little ditty: Son of a Buick of a black Packard, I’m gonna kick you in the Nash and knock the shift outta ya! Amazing not ONE cuss word in that ditty, ya, isn't that something?

One day, when the mood hits, I shall reveal my views on public cussing and how the "F" word is way over used and has absolutely no meaning whatsoever! Don't think so, it's not even in the dictionary, so how great can it be?

Now for you garden experts, what in hell are these things that are growing in my flower bed? Looks like a bee hive but no bees -- ugly looking stuff and should I dig it up and toss it or what?