Bob's Funeral

Bob  works hard at the office but  spends  two  nights each week bowling,  and  plays  golf every Saturday.   His  wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so  for his birthday she takes him to a localstrip  club.   The  doorman at the club greets them and says, 'Hey,  Bob! How ya doin?'   His wife is puzzled  and asks if he's been to this club  before.    'Oh  no,' says Bob.   'He's in my bowling  league.   When they are  seated, a waitress asks Bob  if he'd like  his usual and brings over a  Budweiser.   His  wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and  says, 'How did she  know  that you drink Budweiser?'   'I recognize  her, she's the waitress from the golf  club.   I always have a Bud at the end of  the 1st nine, honey.'   A stripper then  comes over to their table, throws her arms  around Bob, starts to  rub  herself all over him and  says,   'Hi  Bobby. Want your usual table dance, big  boy?'   Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her  purse and storms out of the club.   Bob  follows and spots her getting into a  cab.   Before she can slam the door, he  jumps in beside her. Bob  tries desperately to explain how the stripper  must have mistaken him for someone else, but his  wife is having none of it .   She is  screaming at him at the top of her lungs,  calling him every 4 letter word in the  book..   The cabby turns around and  says,   'Geez Bob, you picked up a real  bitch this time.'   BOB's funeral will  be on Saturday.